Fuck What You Heard I Alumnah’s Crowner of all things GOAT (no LLAMA) . I am like the Queen Elizabeth of this shit here on Alumnah, you know how  she can give somebody that ‘Sir’ title like she runs shit, No Bolelyn Sisters.

Thus I am Crowning the Ottoman the GOAT of all furniture to Fuck on. I cant begin to describe the ish you can do on this thing. Use your imagination, if you fucked with Tetris Hardbody as a young’n, channel that shit and get to work. Plus you can cop one on the low for about 40-50 bucks, thus adding an element to your sex life without having to cop anything mad expensive, I See You Sybian.  You, your partner and your Ottoman will become one. Everywhere you go, your Ottoman will too,  it will become your non-intrusive Buddy. Eventually you will name it, I named mine “Party Time”.  So come on People dont sleep go cop one and show your mate the gift that is the Ottoman, you will get it in promise!

1st Suggested Position: let her lay face down over it and you ram downwards. Ok thats all I can do, I cant hold your hand through this shit!